Non-religious funerals a growing concept in Spain: Rock music, funny anecdotes and alcohol are replacing the traditional solemn mass

TWO in three marriages are civil ceremonies and only half of all children are christened in Spain – and now, non-religious funerals are on the rise.

Traditionally, a Catholic funeral involves a sombre mass – normally in Latin – and an open coffin where no expense is spared in making the deceased look as attractive as possible.

The ceremony is normally held within 24 hours or a maximum of 48 hours after death, and once the religious rites have taken place, the grieving family and friends go home.

Misunderstanding has arisen between Spaniards and northern European expatriates – the tradition of setting up monuments such as benches with a plaque and photograph, of playing the deceased's favourite music, turning up in coloured clothes instead of black attire, and holding a boozy party afterwards to 'celebrate the life' of the departed loved one has often been considered macabre by the native Spanish population, or at the very least, disrespectful.

But this is starting to change, according to orator Eloy Pastrana, whose day job involves speaking at secular funerals.

“Just as each culture bids farewell to their lost loved ones in different ways, we're starting to see this happening in Spain,” Pastrana reveals.

Defining himself as a 'musician, stand-up comic and actor', Pastrana has been giving 'tributes to the dead' for the last six years in his home city of Barcelona.

 

One in four Spaniards are atheists and six in 10 'never go to church'

Even though the national association for the funeral industry, PANASEF, says Catholic services and wakes are still in the majority, lay funerals are rapidly increasing in number, especially in large, cosmopolitan cities.

Catalunya is the region with the highest number of civil funeral ceremonies in Spain, which fits in with a recent survey showing that as many as 55% of the area's residents do not identify with any religion at all.

For Spain as a whole, around 25% identify as atheists, although this may not include residents who were born into a faith and do not consider themselves atheist as such, but never go to a church or other temple and never practise their religion.

Around 61.2% say they never go to mass at all, and only 14% say they attend 'every Sunday without fail'.

According to PANASEF spokesman Josep Ventura, although 80% of funerals in Catalunya were Catholic in the last year, another 19.5% were completely non-religious, whilst the remaining 0.5% represented other branches of Christianity – Lutherism, Anglican, Evangelical, Orthodox and so on – or other faiths altogether such as Judaism, Islam and even Buddhism.

Just two years ago, only 15% of funerals were non-religious and mostly those of foreign nationals, but Ventura says the 'proliferation' of funeral parlours doubling up as crematoria – known as tanatorios in Spain – mean the Catholic aspect of farewell ceremonies is gradually diminishing.

This is because a high number of funerals now take place in a tanatorio rather than a church, albeit most funerals in a tanatorio still tend to be Catholic.

 

'Personalised' ceremonies

Pastrana says last rites are now becoming more 'personalised', something he first noticed at the funeral of a musician friend and which led to his setting up in his business.

“I start off meeting the family so I can prepare a full résumé of the deceased's life, although the initial pain and shock means they are often very reserved at first and give little away,” Pastrana confesses.

“But eventually, you manage to coax them out of themselves, opening up a treasure chest of memories.

“Believe it or not, it works: they want to talk about the person, and there have been times when loved ones discovered things about their departed friend or relative that they had never known about.”

Pastrana says it is 'perfectly possible' to write a 20-minute résumé on a person he has never met, but he always reads it out to the family and goes through the finer points with them.

“We want our interpretation of that person's journey to be correct and faithful to their memory,” Pastrana says.

Music and cava

A non-religious funeral in Catalunya can cost around €200, or €240 if it includes live music, normally with two or three of the deceased's favourite tracks and typically a very varied repertoire.

“We might start off with a requiem or something similar, but some ceremonies have involved hard rock, catchy pop and heavy metal – music is a central part of a person's journey through life, and something that his or her loved ones will always remember,” Pastrana says.

And he reveals that even Catholics have started opting for non-religious funerals.

“Chances are they were christened, but do not practise religion and think lay funerals are more beautiful than the classic Catholic mass,” he muses.

“Secularism is a reality in Spain, and tanatorios need to adapt to this and cater for the growing trend,” Ventura considers.

Lay Europe, an observatory of secularism in Spain, says the death of a loved one leads to a complex set of mixed emotions and that even agnostic families and friends resort to tradition and hold religious funerals.

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