Moving to Spain with children: How to make it work

Perhaps you've always wanted to live in Spain, but have resigned yourself to waiting until your children leave home. Did you know, though, that an estimated 14% of expatriates in Spain bring children under 18 with them? And this is nothing new: Entire generations of adults living in Spain right now were born abroad, but moved to the country when they were little, with their parents.

Spain is a cosmopolitan nation. At any time, approximately 11-13% of the population is of foreign origin, and between a third and a half of long-term expatriates from northern and western Europe are of working age. In fact, children of foreign parents are set to become the majority of under-18s in a generation or so, due to the low birth rate among nationals of fertile age.

Moving to Spain with children can, therefore, be done. And it's usually successful. It may feel like an enormous step to take, though, so we're here to help you with this guide.

Preparing your children for a move to Spain

Firstly, and most importantly, don't just impose a decision to emigrate on your children, whatever their age. Discuss it with them openly – as you would with an adult, but in an age-appropriate manner. Find out what their concerns are, and be honest about your own. Whilst it's important not to dwell on negatives without proposing solutions, try not to present life in Spain as a utopia. Nowhere is absolutely perfect for absolutely everyone to live, and if you instill too much positivity in your children without any realism, you could be setting them up for disappointment and a constant yearning to 'go back home' – which, by then, may not be practical for any of you.

Depending upon their age, the idea of moving to Spain creates different concerns in your child's mind, which you should try to assuage with realistic solutions – not false promises.

Explain how their pets can move to Spain, too

They may be upset at the thought of having to leave their pets behind. Explain the process of pet passports and relocating the non-human family members to them, and make them part of the process. If it's a cat, dog, rabbit or hamster, this will be fairly straightforward, but what if the child's pet is a horse or pony? You'll have a bit more work to do, including seeking out a good livery stable near your intended home, unless you are looking to buy a property with land suitable for grazing and building a stable block. It's still perfectly possible, though – so that's one of your children's main worries dealt with.

Preparing children for change

Children and teenagers find the possibility of change far more disruptive than most adults do. Even though, typically, youngsters adapt to this change quicker than grownups, the thought of it can be more stressful to them in the beginning. You may want to look at ways you can keep your lives as close as possible to that of your home country, in the beginning, until they settle down. This might mean buying a home or renting a property close to an area with a heavy expatriate population, making their favourite meals, contracting a TV service that includes home-country channels, making friends with people of your own nationality, and keeping to a similar routine.

Coping with leaving friends

One of the biggest challenges for children of any age when moving house is the thought of leaving friends behind. Changing schools or leaving hobbies clubs will automatically mean not seeing the same familiar faces, and although tough, it helps make these transitions easier as they progress towards adulthood. At some point in a few short years, they will be leaving school, going to college or university, going to work, moving into a home of their own which may be in a different area.

This is a good time to help them see how friendships and acquaintanceships can evolve, without necessarily weakening their bonds through lack of physical presence. Children nowadays are in a better position than any previous generation from this point of view. Social media means they can be constantly chatting, sharing experiences, showing each other their new homes, and so on, so the will not feel 'cut off'. This makes it easier for young friends to slip back into their relationship when they do see each other.

Also, well-connected airlines allow friends and relatives, if you are moving from a European country, to pop back and forth easily – even just for a weekend. Eventually, the urgency to see each other all the time will ease off, social media will help fill the gaps between physical visits and your children will make new friends.

Practical considerations for moving to Spain with children

It's not all about sunshine, music, sports and socialising. Everyday needs for children in a new country must be fully covered before you even start making the move. Schools, healthcare, special educational needs if applicable, and – of course – a new language are aspects that cannot be ignored until the last minute.

To help you navigate all the other practical considerations of your move, so you can focus your energies on setting up your children's new life, you may want to have a look at our article Moving to Spain checklist: Key steps to take.

Schools

Finding a school for your children is your biggest task, and one that will differ considerably depending upon their age, general educational needs, and personality.

For young children, it is always recommended to place them in a Spanish school, for total immersion in language and culture from an early age. Most expatriates who do this opt for State schools, which are free of charge and widely available. But if you can afford it, you could place them in a private Spanish school or what is known as a colegio concertado. A colegio concertado is a 'halfway house' between private and public, partly State-subsidised and partly fee-paying.

Older children, particularly teenagers and those facing crucial exams at any time within the next year or two, may settle better in an international school. These allow them to follow the same curriculum and in the same language as in their home country, preventing disruptions. However, it is strongly recommended you seek out a bilingual school, or an international school in a largely-Spanish community, to avoid language and integration problems later on.

Many pupils in international schools in less-cosmopolitan communities are, in fact, Spanish, but all teaching is in a different language – typically English, but also German or French in some cases. For Spanish parents, this means their children can grow up bilingual, and can be more effective than sending them to extra-curricular language classes. For international parents, a school of this type means your child's education does not have to suffer due to initial language issues, but they will be able to make friends with Spanish children. Socialising is an extremely effective way to develop language skills.

Healthcare

Full-time permanent residents in Spain are usually entitled to State healthcare, which is free at the point of use and with relatively affordable prescription costs. Those who work for a company, are registered as self-employed or are on a State pension from their own country automatically qualify from the first day, subject to completing the correct paperwork. Those who fall outside these categories may still be entitled to free State healthcare, or be able to use it for a small monthly fee.

Emergency care for residents of any age is covered by the State, as is any treatment in connection with pregnancy, childbirth, or infectious or contagious diseases. All patients under 18 receive treatment free. If you are legally working, your children are considered dependants under your own Social Security contributions until the age of 26 or until they no longer live with you, whichever happens first. You should research this thoroughly – for yourself, as well as your children, since you need to look after your own health for their benefit, too – before moving to Spain. More on this subject can be found in our article Navigating Spain's national healthcare system.

Language

Even if you are retired, you need to learn Spanish to live in Spain – and children even more so. They will need to navigate exams, higher education, vocational training and, later, the job market, which will be impossible if they do not speak the language.

You should all start learning together before you move to Spain. Once you are there, even many State schools offer remedial language lessons for foreign pupils, especially if you live in a fairly cosmopolitan area. If they do not, though, you will need to arrange extra-curricular lessons for your children, which may need to be very intensive, and stress to them the extreme importance of their paying attention and taking these classes seriously.

Fortunately for children in this situation, it's very common for youngsters in Spain to take extra classes in addition to their everyday schooling. Many Spanish children attend English classes at least two evenings a week, sometimes with private lessons in addition, and may also have other evening or weekend classes is maths, sports, computing, or similar core subjects. Even though children in Spain have three months of summer holiday – to make up for a lack of half-term holidays – they may spend a lot of their weekday mornings or evenings in extra academic classes, or even be sent away to an educational summer camp for several weeks. If your child needs to spend lots of extra hours in lessons to learn Spanish, they will not need to see this as some kind of 'punishment', nor something that makes them feel 'different' to their peers; most of their friends will be doing the same, albeit in other subjects. To help you get started, you might like to read our article How to learn Spanish when moving to Spain: Taking the first steps.